Ah, that spark in relationships that films often portray as everlasting and effortless. As with most things in life, relationships take work. Sometimes a little, sometimes allot. But over the years in my relationships (yes, there have been a few), I have learnt a few things that, for me, have helped maintain a strong and healthy relationship. We now pass our words of wisdom to you…
Space can be a great thing
Have you heard of that expression ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’? Well it’s true! Don’t you find that when you are not with your partner, you often miss him? And isn’t it so that the longer you are away from him, the more you tend to miss him? Or is that just me? It often makes you value the time you do have together allot more than if you were in each others shoes 24/7.
Don’t sacrifice everything you love just because your partner might dislike it
You play PlayStation games, he doesn’t. He loves art-house cinema, you hate it. Giving up things you both love for fear of disappointing your partner is a surefire way to eventually resent them. Celebrate your differences, as long as they don’t dominate the relationship. It’s good to keep a sense of self.
Try new things
Perhaps you have both got into the habit of going to the same restaurant for date night, going to the same coffee house for your Saturday morning caffeine fix and staying in the same hotel, in the same resort, in the same country for your annual summer holiday… Now, I’m not saying that it’s wrong to be a creature of habit, but do try new things when you can. Create new experiences for yourselves and make new memories.
Choose sentiment over expense
I am by no means suggesting you become a ‘cheapskate’ but let’s say you were planning on going out for dinner on a Friday as per usual? Let’s swap that for making breakfast together on Saturday morning with that new cookbook you just bought. Make that sexy food fight a reality finally. Doing that in that restaurant will end in you both being kicked out. Plus, we all know what comes next after the sexy food fight right?! And you know you can’t do that in a restaurant. Well maybe you can…
Leave little notes or gifts for your partner from time to time
Whether it’s spelling out a funny message with those fridge magnets you have or leaving a post-it note in the study for them, this is just another way to remind them you think about and appreciate them. Remember, its the little things that count.
Plan little getaway weekends
Some couples prefer to save their pennies for one or two big holidays a year but I always think it’s nice to break up the working year with a few good value and creative weekends away. Stress of the everyday can be a huge weight on relationships, so planning breaks, no matter how close to home they might be, really help take the pressure off when it’s needed.