Afraid of Commitment? Make a Commitment With Me!

Rob Curtis

Rob Curtis
13 December 2017

Even without being close to a relationship, I sometimes think I’m afraid of commitment. Like anything I think commitment is a muscle so why don’t you join me in some commitment training?

It’s official – I’m getting fat. Well maybe that’s a little dramatic but in the first ten weeks since I’ve been at Gaydar, I have probably worked 12 hours a day, 7 days a week. This time has been particularly important to help me to get to know the team, to speak to members, and to come up with a plan to make sure we keep evolving and growing our community. It’s been fun too – I’ve learned more about identity, happiness, loneliness, sex – all sorts of things really. On the other hand, I’ve also eaten too much bad food and enjoyed a little too much wine.

Like most of us, when I look at myself in the mirror there’s always a little voice that picks out my faults. Normally I just ignore that voice because I tend to live a relatively balanced life – eating reasonably well (until the sweets come out) and exercising every day. Plus, I’ve been cycling at least 45 minutes a day to and from the Gaydar office and around London to different meetings. After I saw my pictures in FS Magazine this week, however, it’s a little harder to ignore that voice – pointing out my little belly that’s suddenly popped up, the additional roundness in my cheeks, the slight loosening of my belt buckle after I eat. It’s harder to ignore because I’m not looking after myself as well as I should.

The thing about London that I love is that Christmas is cold and cosy. Everyone is rugged up and this last week we had snow which basically means that it’s time to crack out the pies and pasta and open a bottle of red wine. There’s a reason we call it silly season. It’s also like running the gauntlet with mince pies coming at you from the right and bounding over a box of Cadbury “heroes” as yet another drinks function coming flying in from the left. I love to eat, drink and be gay. But as the new year approaches, I count my blessings that it’ll be a few months before my next beach visit (maybe another year Rio de Janiero).

So it’s time for me to start making a commitment to myself.

A commitment to restore balance to my life and to start getting healthy again. From 1st January, I’ll be making a commitment to the entire Gaydar community and invite you to join me. This isn’t one of those total body transformations where we’ll have to starve ourselves for 12 weeks. Instead we’ll focus on simple, practical things we can do to improve our every-day health and happiness. At the end of our 12 week commitment, Gaydar will be offering prizes to some of the people that have stuck it out along the way!

It’s ok to be single, but we’re sexier when we’re healthy and happy so let’s train that commitment muscle with a commitment to ourselves. If you want to join in, drop me an email at If you have any friends that you think will want to join in, share this on Facebook and don’t forget to tag them.


Rob Curtis

Rob Curtis

Rob is Gaydar’s Managing Director. Rob is a keen advocate of LGBT issues and has appeared on the BBC, Huffington Post, Buzzfeed, Instinct and O Globo (Brazil) tackling HIV stigma. Rob spent his career in consultancy and finance until October when he was hired as the new MD to define and implement Gaydar’s new vision to connect people from all spectrums of the LGBT+ community, online and offline.



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